Recommendations

One of the most common questions I get is, do I do videography as well. And my answer is, “No, BUT I know some AMAZING people who do!”

I have been working in the wedding industry as a photographer since 2010, so you would think that I have met a lot of great videographers. But, the truth is, I have met a LOT of not so great videographers. Ones who come with so much clunky equipment, they get in the way of important moments, they block the view of your guests, they are always in the background of your photos, and take up a lot of time “staging” these pretty cheesy moments, and therefor taking up precious time on your wedding day.

So here is a list of my recommended videographers! As well as my top picks for band, DJ, and hair.

---

Videographers

Kamp Weddings

Modern | Talented | Playful

A husband and wife duo that will make magic happen! Joe and Amanda are newlyweds that totally get it, they are hip, fresh, and SO much fun to work with!  They work with cutting edge equipment, that won’t get in the way, so guests won’t even know they are there. Having them at your wedding will add to your experience, and not take away from it.

•Instagram @kampweddings

Orchard Street Studio

Sweet | Personal | Clean

Julian is the owner of Orchard Street Studio, and we LOVE to work together. He is the first person I call when I need a lead photographer, a second photographer, or videographer. Our mission and style are so aligned, plus we have worked together so much at this point, we read each other’s minds.

•Instagram @OrchardStreetStudio

Palmieri Photography

Seasoned | Kind | Profesional

Joey is yet another wonderful human and talented videographer. It is always such a pleasure to work with him, it seems as if he can shoot weddings with his eyes closed! I am a big fan of his work!

•Instagram @ojesph

Studio 94

Realistic Story Telling | Low Key

If you want to remember the sound of your friends and families voices, you will really like his style. I only worked with Tim Hillmann once, at an intimate backyard event. We had a great time working together. His style isn’t too fancy or over the top.

•Instagram @studio94video

Pharaoh Videography

Cinematic | Drone | Vibrant

Maybe I am biased because Mina and I hit it off, talking about my trip to Egypt, and how much I miss the street food in Cairo! But for sure you will enjoy working with him too. He has a distinct style and vision, and makes everyone look like a movie star!

•Instagram @pharaoh_videography_minaelkoms

---

DJ

DJ Ben Boylan

Humble | Knowledgeable | Personal

Do you know how many DJ’s out there think that YOUR wedding is their “night club”, and that they are SO cool? … Yeah… But not Ben! :) Ben is the sweetest guy, and he has such a genuine love for music! I wish so bad that I met him when I was planning my wedding. Not only will he only get on the mic when it is helpful and appropriate, he will get your dance floor bumping!!! He is so professional, and will help your evening run smoothly without being the center of attention. He is the best!

•Instagram @djbenboylan

Sonic Entertainment

Professional | Not Your Average NJ DJ

I worked with these two gentlemen and it was a total surprise compared to so many larger fancy-pants New Jersey DJs… Because they cared about what the couple wanted, on THEIR day. The groom wanted to give his bride 15 gifts before the reception started, and it took some time. Most DJ’s would have been having a fit! Because, it would be “cutting into their set”, or something… But these guys were like, “Okay cool, we are ready when you are”. Ahhhhhh, you have no idea how nice that was to hear! :)

•Instagram @sonicdjs

---

Band

Lion + Tiger Band

Fun | Talented | Down To Earth

Great sound quality, talented, and lots of fun! The bride and groom said this band was the highlight of their wedding, and I can see why! :) They also did a beautiful job with the wedding ceremony. And when it comes to your reception, you want to feel the live music in your soul, but you don’t want to feel a ringing in your ears the next day from the band playing so unbelievably loud that the guests have to leave the room to talk. They were one of the only bands I have worked with that filled the room with good vibes, without blasting the speakers.

•Instagram @liontigerband

---

Beauty

First a mini tidbit on hair and makeup… It’s not only important to look great on your wedding day, (because those pictures are forever! wink wink.) But your getting ready experience can set the pace for the day. If hair and makeup runs behind, that means something else will have to give. It could mean less photos, or that you have to chug your second mimosa, rather than sip it. We want those bubbles to go down nice and smooth.

OPAL - NY

As if mother nature herself used the breeze to effortlessly design hair!

Her work is stunning. To make a hairstyle look soft, natural, and flowy is where she really stands out, above the rest! To see the wedding, click here!

But aside from that, I bonded with Rebecca right away. I had a 4 week old baby at the time, and I was severely sleep deprived. Then I found out, this momma had twins!! We both had to slip into the other room to pump milk, and she was such a super-mom! :)

•Instagram @rebeccawhitakerhair

Kristi Reynolds Kearney - NJ

Her hair styles are just strait up good!

Take a peek at her instagram… those curls! Hello! :) She does beautiful work. Take a peek at the wedding she did!

•Instagram @ hair_ by _kristi_

FAQ

Where are you located?

I am located in northern New Jersey. I am a lifestyle photographer, and our photoshoot will take place at a location of our choosing, (a park, your home, your business, etc.) not in a studio. More about location here!

How soon can I expect my pictures?

Editing Turnaround Times:

• Headshots, 2 weeks

• Family Shoots, Portrait Sessions, Small Events, and Product Photography, 3 weeks

• Weddings, and Larger Commercial Jobs, 6 weeks

If you need your photos done sooner than my estimated turn around time, your photoshoot can be expedited, for a fee.

I pride myself on delivering the finished product to all of my clients, in a timely manner. This means often working on holidays, wake up early and stay up late, to get the job done. I wish I could snap my fingers, and boom, send you your gallery link! The truth is, the editing process is a long one. Countless decisions are made on each photo, to be sure the final product is up to my standards.

Are the pictures you send us, Photoshopped?

I happen to be a wizard in photoshop! However the standard editing that is included in all of my packages is not Photoshop. (I explain this in detail, with examples, here.) If you are interested in any retouching and photo touch ups, you can let me know at anytime!

Will you be the person taking the pictures?

Yup!! :) In the case that our schedules cannot match up, and I myself can’t be there, I will point you to one of the lovely and talented artists in my photo-tribe. (For weddings see more info down below.)

Who owns the copyright of the photos?

I own the copyright in all of my photos, however I grant my clients permission to use their photos for personal use. This includes use on social media, sharing directly with friends and family, and making prints.

I ask that you tag @somewheregrounded when posting on any social media platform. (As of 2021 my watermark is no longer mandatory while posting publicly.)

Limitations include selling or granting permission to any third party, or posting publicly without giving photo credit.

Do you provide props or backdrops?

Sometimes simple props can add playfulness, storytelling, and variety to our session. For example, picture a family gathered around while their parent plays the guitar, or an engagement shoot with a bottle of champagne. We will discuss these things while we curate your photoshoot. :) There’s more info about props and newborn sessions below.

I do own backdrops and studio lighting, however this is not a product that I offer at this time. I find that people look best and most natural in real life. I work on location, at your home, venue, business, or a local park. (This is corny so I wont say it… but, what I am thinking is, “The world is our backdrop!”) I do offer a backdrop and studio lighting for corporate headshots for groups of 10 or larger.

How many photos can I expect?

The final number of photos will vary from job to job. Location, clothing changes, family size, and cooperation of small children will have an impact.

Estimated Photo Count:

• 1 hr Portrait Sessions, Roughly 75-150 Photos

• Weddings, Roughly 700-1200 Photos

• Engagement Session, Roughly 250 Photos

• Headshots, Roughly 40 Photos

What if it rains on our scheduled session?

If our session has to be postponed due to weather, you will not lose your deposit, we will simply reschedule. In the very rare case the weather causes us to reschedule and there is no dates available for us to reschedule, I will refund your deposit.

If weather conditions are workable, but not ideal, we are still on. Much of my work is done outside, and weather is always a factor, but we work with nature, and make the best of it. If it looks a little gloomy outside, don’t fret, cloud coverage is a photographer’s dream! And your pictures will not come out dark or grey.

Do you offer mini sessions?

I do not offer mini-shoots at this time. I like to work in a very individualized way. The majority of time invested in creating your final product is done before and after the actual photo session, with corresponding, planning, travel, and editing.

If you are on a budget I do offer group rates. More info on all of my packages can be found in my package brochure, just message me for more information.

---

WEDDING FAQ

How far do you travel?

I am always passport ready!!! :) I love to travel, so when photography and travel come together, I couldn’t be happier! I do have a small travel fee for locations over an hour from me. If you are interested in having me photograph your destination wedding we can discuss the details, as each situation is quite unique.

Who is your second shooter?

All of my second shooters are experienced wedding photographers who photograph their own weddings as a lead shooter on a regular basis. Your second shooter and I know each other well, and you can expect the same professionalism, style, and easy going attitude from them.

After the editing process, you won’t be able to tell who took what photo.

What if you are already booked on my wedding date?

If I cannot be the one to capture your day, I will reach out to my team and set you up with one of my photographers who you will fall in love with!

I will still be in charge of the planning process and editing, and you will have the opportunity to get to know your photographer.

If you have not shot a wedding at our venue, will you scope it out in advance?

I have photographed a LOT of weddings, however there are also a huge amount of places in the world to get married. So there is a good chance I have not yet had the pleasure of photographing a wedding at your location.

I do have a $150 scouting fee where we can meet at your venue or I can go exploring on my own. In MOST cases this is not at all necessary. It is the years of experience as an event photographer that gives me the skills to work with the lighting, weather, and time constraints of the moment to make fast decisions to chose the best backdrops and be sure you get a variety of photos that show of the beautiful space you two chose.

Will we get the RAW files?

Similarly to how a chef wouldn’t serve you uncooked food at a restaurant, I don’t give RAW or unedited files to my clients. Often people don’t have the programs to handle RAW files, and the high resolution files that you will receive are plenty large enough for you to blow up, and hang on your wall. :)

If you are a photographer, or graphic designer, and you do have the computer setup and know-how to work with RAW files, my process is to provide my clients with a finished product that is inline with my artistic vision. If you have further questions regarding RAW files, please don’t hesitate to ask.

Do you make wedding albums?

You can choose to have me custom design each page of your wedding album, or you can use the program that is conveniently in the store of your online gallery, and you can use the stunning templates to design your own album! Choose from a variety of cover materials and sizes.

How soon can we expect our photos?

I remember just how excited I was to see my wedding photos! The day felt like a DREAM!!! I NEEDED to see photos just so that I knew it was real! :)

You can expect your completed gallery in 6 weeks following your wedding. Be sure to follow me on instagram @somewheregrounded because I often post sneak peeks and live updates of my editing on my Instagram stories!

A lot goes into your photos after the night is over. Downloading from all of the cameras, importing into the editing program, exposing the finished files, then uploading them in chapters to your gorgeous private gallery! If your wedding is 8 hours with two photographers, this could easily mean 25 hours of editing. (And that is if my second shooter doesn’t go camera happy on the dance floor!)

Do you require a deposit?

Yes. With our singed agreement I require a $500 retainer fee to hold your wedding date. This retainer is non-refundable. This will be covered in more detail in your Wedding Photography Agreement.

How many photos can we expect?

You can expect something around 700-1200 edited photos. (Just a remember editing is different than photoshopped. Read more here!) Of course the hours of coverage, number of photographers, amount of people in your wedding party/family/guest-list will have an impact on the final count.

---

NEWBORN

When is the best time to take newborn photos?

There is no one “best time”, each phase of your babies development will come along with photography pros and cons. It is truly a personal choice.

In the first week or so, your sweet new baby will be soooo sleepy! This is a good thing, if you want those adorable sleeping pictures. Some parents like to wait about 2-3 weeks, when the umbilical cord scab falls off, this is nice for those newborn naked photos.

And some parents don’t feel ready in the first few weeks, and then time gets away from them, and the newborn photos don’t happen until the baby is a few months old. This comes along with some positives as well, as they will have developed some more head control, and possibly eye contact and smiles.

I understand that you might be recovering, exhausted, sleep deprived, and emotions could be running high! I recommend we pencil something in to your best estimation, and you just keep me up to date when your little one arrives. (Read more below about how to reserve a date.)

Do you supply props?

I will bring a Moses Basket, and some special pillows to put under your blankets to help position your baby. I will work with the adorable and cozy blankets and gifts that you have at your home. This will help make the shoot unique to you and your aesthetic.

Sometimes I am able to pick up some fresh flowers and greens to add texture to the photos. If this is something you are interested in, please let me know, and we will discuss further.

If you are unsure if you have the right things, or if you are trying to capture a specific look, let me know and we can come up with some fun ideas together! Keep in mind, we are telling the real story of your little baby, so less “props” is more!

Will you come to our home?

Absolutely! To me, the newborn chapter is all about being nestled in at home together. It is also where you and your baby will likely feel the most comfortable. We can talk about the lighting in your home to help choose the best time of day for our session.

If its a beautiful warm day, we can take some photos outside too!

What clothes should they wear?

I am sure you have all you need. Onesies or a swaddle is often the best look for newborn photos. You will only want 2-3 clothing options for your baby. Often at this age, less clothing is better. We don’t want them drowning in a 3 peace suit, it will only cover up their cute little rolls, and their tiny little arms and legs.

I like to stay way from clothing with words, logos, or characters on it. Just keep it natural if possible.

Do you require a security deposit when booking a newborn session? What if my baby comes sooner/later than I expected?

I require a $100 retainer to hold a date for all photoshoots. However, for newborn sessions only, I allow clients to reschedule one time without loosing their retainer fee. Due to the unpredictability of when your little one will arrive, and how you will be feeling afterwards, we can make our best guess on a good date for your shoot. (See above for recommended times to schedule your newborn shoot.)

For newborn shoots, I would only hold the retainer as a cancellation fee, if you change your mind and we don't have a photoshoot, or if you need to move the date more than once.

Still have questions?

Birth Photography FAQ

What locations do you serve?

I am located in northern New Jersey. For most photography I will travel, and even fly, almost anywhere! However due to the unpredictable nature of birth, I like to not be more than an hour away from where you expect to give birth. (More about my location here!)

Do you require a deposit?

Yes. I require a 50% retainer at booking. This retainer is non-refundable. Your balance is due one week after delivery. This will be covered in more detail in our photography agreement.

What happens if you cannot make it to my birth?

I will be on call for you from around 38-43+ weeks, depending on your pregnancy. I will do everything in my power to be at your birth!

(See below for protocol around how I book photoshoots and weddings that might interfere with your due date.)

If for some reason that is out of my control, I cannot make it to your birth, your retainer fee would be kept, and you would be offered a complimentary 2 hour newborn session. I cannot refund the retainer fee because I will have moved other client schedules, been on call day and night, and likely lost other photography jobs in the effort of being at your birth.

If the baby comes faster than you expect, and as I am on my way you deliver your beautiful baby, and I didn’t make it in time, I would photograph all that I can in those sweet moments after, and not charge you the balance.

Examples of what is out of my control would be:

• The baby comes so fast that I was not able to drive there in time.

• You end up having a cesarean delivery, and the doctors/hospital do not allow me to photograph the surgery, or you are not interested in photos of your c-section.

• Hospital policies do not allow me to enter.

• I am photographing a wedding, and cannot physically make it to your birth in time. (If it is later in the evening, I would ask my bride if my second shooter could take over, so that I could photograph your birth. But of course I cannot leave in the middle of their event.)

How soon can I expect my birth pictures?

Editing Turnaround Time is 3 weeks.

Be sure to follow me on Instagram for a sneak peek (If you have given me permission to share some of the photos.) If you need your photos done sooner than my estimated turn around time, your photoshoot can be expedited, for a fee.

Are the pictures you send us, Photoshopped?

I happen to be a wizard in photoshop! However the standard editing that is included in all of my packages is not Photoshop. (I explain this in detail, with examples, here.) If you are interested in any retouching and photo touch ups, you can let me know at anytime!

Do You photograph home births / Unassisted Births/ Birth Center Births/ and Hospital Births?

I am not currently offering my photography or birth keeping services in the hospital setting. I am focusing my efforts in the environment where I am most aligned, and that is free births, unassisted births, home births, and birth center births.

Are You a Certified Doula?

I am a Birth Keeper, and support women in ways beyond just photography. You can learn about that Here!

Now, hold on… let me get up on my soap box! (If your medical provider asks, then YES, I am certified. Wink.)

I have no official "certification", and it's on purpose!! Could I pay a few hundred bucks and get a certification in a few weeks, yes. Would I … no! I have dedicated the past 4+ years to learning about birth; physiological birth. Not on purpose, I am just infatuated and in love with birth! Not a day goes by that I am not learning: taking seminars, listening to podcasts, reading, talking with midwives/ doulas/ birth keepers.

There is also no accreditation or government that overseas doula certifications. "Doula" simply means a woman servant. Anyone can be there to support you, if you find their presents is supportive.

Does the father of your child need to show a marriage license to prove he is your partner? No. Many hospitals tightened up their rules during covid. Before it was common to have your mother, sister or friend with you, as well as your husband/partner. It seems hospitals have taken this opportunity to make having support, more difficult.

Many of the popular doula certifications like DONA, are big money makers, and have teamed up with the medical model, and doulas can lose these certifications if they are caught advocating for the mother. So more and more doulas are seeing this, and starting to find a more holistic route of certification, or giving up their certification all together. I personally call myself a "birth keeper" not a doula, because I feel that I protect the birth space, and I want to separate myself from the politics that come with today’s understanding of the word "doula".

Do you photograph C-Sections?

I am not currently offering my services for hospital births, unless it is a birth center, or home birth transfer. As far as taking photos in the OR, this is much up to the regulations of each hospital and the OB.

I am open to discussing these options with you, as well as if you would like me to stay behind the curtain, or photograph the surgery if medical staff allow it.

How many photos can I expect?

You will not be limited to a certain amount of photos.

The final number of photos will vary from birth to birth, so it is almost impossible to put a number on it.

I will tell you that like all my photoshoots, you will get as many shots as I take, including outtakes! I only remove redundant photos, or photos that are not up to my standards.

What if you have a wedding/other photoshoot when I go into labor?

I will be on call, this means having a bag packed, and my cameras ready, as well as keeping my phone volume up and close by at night, so I can get your call.

If someone wishes to book a photoshoot with me in the 6 week window surrounding your due date, I will let them know of the chance that I would have to reschedule with them.

If I am booked for a photoshoot before you booked your birth, I will reach out to my client as ask if they would be willing to be flexible, should you have birth during their scheduled shoot. All of my clients book with a security deposit, so I will have to honor their choice, but most are very understanding!

If I am booked for a wedding, I have an obligation to that couple, and of course cannot leave an event. We can discuss these situations in farther detail if it pertains to your due date.

Who owns the copyright to the photos?

I own the copyright to all of my work, and grant my clients permission to use the photos for personal use. Please see my main FAQ page for more details.

Do you make photo albums/prints?

You can use the program that is conveniently in the store of your online gallery, and you can use the stunning templates to design your own album! Choose from a variety of cover materials and sizes.

---

Still have questions?

Tips for a Great Newborn Session

Over the course of 8 years taking newborn photos, as well as becoming a mother myself in 2019, I have picked up a few tricks along the way. Here are my 7 tips for a successful newborn photoshoot!

Pro Tip #1

Have them dressed in your favorite outfit or swaddle before I arrive. If they are milk drunk and cozy, the last thing we want to do is wake them, to dress them.

Of course we don’t want them to spit up on the cute outfit/onesie, so cover them with a swaddle or large enough burp cloth to protect their clothing, until we are ready to start shooting. If they have a blowout diaper… there isn’t much we can do about that! So we will just roll with it. :) The good news is, they will look so cute in just about anything!

2: Make Sure the Room is Warm Enough

We want them to feel warm and cozy, even when you place them down for some solo pictures. If your body is nice and warm, and the room has a chill, it will be more likely to disturb them. If it is the winter time it could be good to use a space heater in the room you plan on shooting in. You want it to be warm enough that you are comfortable/warm in just a t-shirt. If you are worried about it being too cold, let me know and I can bring a heater.

3: Choose Just Two-Three Outfits for Baby

Newborns don’t seem to like to be changed over and over. Changing diapers, or outfits can disturb them, and it can be hard to get them relaxed again. So the less outfit changes the better.

Also, when choosing your clothing options, less is more. A simple onesie, diaper, or swaddle is often best. Shoes, overalls, and fluffy dresses are cute on toddlers, but they will coverup a newborn, be likely to scrunch up, and it wont look great in photos.

Clothing Tips: Avoid wording, logos, busy patterns, and lots of bold colors (This goes for clothing for the whole family, not just baby.) Neutral colors will help baby stand out, and make for a more timeless look.

4: Be Prepared for Baby to be More Hungry Than Ever!

I have no idea why, but we are always shocked at how often baby wants to feed during a photoshoot. I guess being a model is just hard work! Newborn shoots are extra long to allow a slow pace and to let them have plenty of milk breaks.

This doesn’t always mean less photos. Whether you are nursing or bottle feeding, it’s a special bond that I am happy to photograph as well.

5: Choose the Best Room (or Rooms) for Photos

Notice the light in your home, and move any clutter from the room you hope to take pictures in.

We can take all of the photos in one room, or use many rooms of your home. Nice window light is key! The nursery is often a great place. Also, on the parent’s bed and in the living room. For more of a lifestyle/editorial shoot, the kitchen can be the best place to capture those authentic family moments.

I will of course help you decide what room to start in or focus on when I arrive for our shoot! :)

6: Don’t Be Sorry!!!

Don’t stress, I know having a newborn is a lot to handle. So if there are dishes in the sink, laundry on the floor, and breast pump parts on the coffee table, cool! There should be! :) I have been there! I get it.

If your little one is crying and we are having a tough time getting them to settle… don’t be sorry. This all comes with the territory. I got you!

7: Have a Basket or Two on Hand

As you might know I don’t use “props”, (signs and backdrops or oversized toys). But a basket is a beautiful way to capture newborns. I can always bring my Moses Basket, and I have some special pillows that will help us support baby, and make him/her nice and cozy. If you have some baskets at home, or want to pick one up at the store Target and Homegoods have some good finds.

Have more Questions?

Check out my FAQ page! :) General questions at the top, and newborn specific questions at the bottom of the page.

Steps to Green-Living (Part 2)

In the beginning of 2020 I put spending time in nature, and cutting back on single use products at the forefront of my focus. How did I do?

Check, Check, CHECK! I did it!

Less plastic, less paper towel, bye bye sponges, hello cloth diapers, hello electric vehicle, and falling in love with plastic free grocery stores.

If you go back and read my first post “Small Green Steps” you can read about all of my little and practical tips and tricks on leaving less of a footprint.

NEW Steps Towards a Greener Life!

• Switched to Cloth Diapers!

  (A whole post on that, coming soon.) This felt like the biggest step because I never imagined I would do this, but I am so glad I made the switch!

• Started Using Microfiber Cleaning Cloths!

  (I use these from Amazon), to replace MOST paper towel usage. And whoa, it cleans SO much better than paper towel. Paper towel feels like a waist of time when it comes to cleaning now. You just collect the used towels, and run a wash on them, and they are good as new. (Thank you to my big sister for this idea.)

• Replaced Sponges, with Something Way Better!

  I started to make my own linen dish washing cloths, to replace sponges. This idea came from a friend, and whoa… sponges just …. no use for them now! (Sponges are made from plastics, and also hold onto a lot of bacteria.)

• Electric Car

  I went from a gasoline powered SUV, to a fully electric car! It’s a Tesla and I am never going back. With gas savings, never having to do an oil change, not paying sales tax, and a $5k rebate from NJ due to causing far less emissions, owning a Tesla Model 3 is WAY more affordable than you would think.

• Meat and Eggs from Local Farm

  I now get a lot (but not yet all) of my eggs and meat from a local NJ, veteran owned, farm Dutch Hill Farm. But I can’t even take the credit, through the pandemic they made it so easy, and delivered right to your door! They just opened up their own store in Spring Lake, NJ!

• Started Shopping at Plastic Free Refill Stores!

  This is SUCH a game changer! And my dream is that the whole world returns to this style of shopping. It is simple, you bring your own reusable or recycled jars and containers, and you fill them up with as little or as much of any product you want, and you pay by weight. So if you just want to try a little of something, or you just need 1 cup for a recipe, you can!

  Do You Buy: pasta, oats, olive oil, nuts, sugar, vinegars, beans, seeds, granola, chocolate chips, dish soap? Then head to Dry Good’s Refillery in Montclair, NJ! The last time I was there the owner (seen in the photo above) saw that I was struggling to keep my 2 year old from touching things, while I was shopping, so she so kindly brought him over to her chalk board wall, and let him draw. Now come on!— This is the world I want to live in! Where a mom can feel supported and seen by another mom. Where a business owner is not only so passionate about changing the plastic imprint on the world, but going the extra mile to help her customers. They also have fresh bread from a local French baker, and other goods like eggs, milk, cheeses, and produce.

  Do You Buy: dish soap, laundry detergent, all purpose cleaner, glass cleaner, hand soap, shampoo/conditioner, shower gel, even things like peroxide, aloe vera, and kid’s soap? Then head over to Good Bottle Refill , also located in Montclair, NJ! They have so much here, you just have to go check it out yourself! I believe you can even order online, and have everything delivered!

  I got a hair conditioner there recently that smells like I am at a high end spa, with Cedar & Sage! These stores are also stocked with so many eco-friendly products, it is a great place to shop for meaningful gifts that are better for our planet! If you don’t have bottles of your own, no problem, they have some you can buy!

• Started to Recycle Soft Film Plastics, PROPERLY!

  Are you asking, what are “soft film plastics”? Basically, all plastic bags, and plastics that cannot be put into your regular recycling. Amazon bubble envelopes, plastic shopping bags, chip bags, the plastic bags that every sing thing you buy seems to come in.

  The problem is most people toss these things in the trash, or try to put them into their regular plastic recycling (I’m guilty of that!). But these items only clog the recycling plants, as their machines are not made for this type of products.

  It is easy! Just collect all of these bags inside another one of these bags and bring them to select locations around you, and they will be processed properly and turned into amazing things like decks by NexTrex. I drop my bags off at the Kohl’s near me, but you can look up locations near you, here.

• Shampoo Bar (No Plastic Packaging!)

  Trader Joe’s sells one that is very affordable! (Shampoo bars that I have found online were too much money, in my opinion, and I didn’t want to take the risk of hating it.) I am really happy with this product. It lathers up better than you would expect, and I have really long hair. It seems to clean my hair, without drying it out. If you have oily hair, you probably wouldn’t need conditioner, just this bar. I imagine I’ll be buying this from now on. (My favorite organic hair tip is here!)

• Cloth Menstruation Pads

  The thing is, when you are used to washing your child’s poop out of cloth diapers, suddenly disposable menstruation pads seem like such a waste! I personally don’t mind blood at all, and I don’t see period blood as gross or “un-pure” in anyway!

  If you don’t know already, there is no such thing as TMI in my book… so get over it :)!

  I have fairly light periods to begin with, so a small cloth liner is all I need many days. It is also nice to use these when you are not sure if your cycle is done for good, or going to surprise you with a little more. For heavier days I still use tampons or pads that do a better job at absorbing quickly. I need to look into something a bit more substantial than these liners. But real change happens one small step at a time.

What’s My Next Step for Low Waste Goals?

• Take Out Container Waste

  This drives me CRAZY! I still struggle with remembering to tell takeout places to NOT give us all this plastic. Few people actually need the crappy fork and knife. And 37 packs of ketchup or soy sauce. Why?… Like please, save yourselves some money, and don’t add all this trash to each order!!!

Question! Does anyone bring their own reusable container for takeout? Like a metal bento box? Do places frown upon that?

• I Want to Get More of My Foods Through Local Farms

  I’d love to join a CSA next summer, but I haven’t found any in this area. I also want to buy raw milk from a dairy farm. I know of one in NJ but it is an hour away. Any recommendations?

• I Want to Start Composting

  We have been trying to buy a home for almost two years, but still live in an apartment. I have turned my fire escape into our garden, but composting seems out of the question for now. But one day!

I’m just a photographer loving all the green around us! Thanks for reading!

You Might Also Like! “Minimalist Mama Must Haves”

Eco-Friendly Dish Sponge Alternative

Replacing Dirty Sponges with an Eco-Friendly Alternative

Here are some of the things that this linen cloth can do that your sponge cannot!

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

• Fit inside tiny spaces like the corners of Stasher Bags, the handle of your blender, between the threads of screw on bottles, inside any narrow jar/small space.

• Last a very long time, without ever getting stinky. Linen is naturally anti-microbial. (Sponges seem to be a natural breading ground for bacteria.) If you rinse, squeeze, and hang your dish cloth between uses, it simply doesn’t get gross. I started using my first one in February (5 months ago), and it has holes in it, and is getting tread bare from so much use, but it still works great and doesn’t smell. I used to replace sponges every month.

• It is washable! If you wanted to, just toss it in the wash along with your towels.

• Better scrubbing power than your average sponge with the scrubby pad.

• Safe on all surfaces.

• Wrap around the end of a wooden spoon to instantly become a bottle brush.

• Great suds power. I thought that it would probably not lather up the soap as well as a sponge, but it is the opposite!

• Better for the environment (obviously)!

I hope to start making more of these and selling them on my Etsy shop, as well as have plenty on hand to give as housewarming gifts.

Let me know if you are interested! Comment bellow!

And I MUST give credit to the lovely and talented Susan Baker! She is my photographer, and has taught me so much about healthy living, and this was her idea.

---

Be sure to read my other posts about the first steps I took towards a greener life in 2020, and (coming soon!) how the progress has been going in 2022!

You Might Also Like! “Minimalist Mama Must Haves”

5 Tips for Dads During Labor

I believe the first words out of my mouth after giving birth to our son was, “We did it”. I felt in my bones that my husband was the anchor I needed to keep my mind and body above water, when the going got really tough. I couldn’t have made the baby without him, and I don’t think I would have accomplished my goal of unmedicated vaginal birth without him either.

1. You are the Gate Keeper

You are what stands between her birth sanctuary, and the rest of the world. Throughout the pregnancy, and definitely in birth, you might feel powerless. You cannot push for her, you can not breath for her.. but you can stand guard and witness her mind-blowing strength… You can help protect her from her own doubts, and the pressures from strangers in the room.

Depending on the stage of labor, your partner won’t be able to speak. Advocate for her. Know her plan, her expectations, her desires in advance, and voice them to the rest of the birth team when need be. (Example: If she doesn’t want to be strapped to a monitor the whole time, and the nurses start to put one on her, kindly tell them that she prefers intermittent monitoring. Or if she wants to be continually monitored, ask for a wireless option so she can walk around freely, take a shower, etc..)

Often hospitals are in autopilot and assume that it is business as usual. And it is easy to feel overwhelmed and like a fish out of water when you are about to have a baby and in an unfamiliar environment, like a hospital.

2. Read the Room

There will be a time for jokes, when comic relief can be like medicine, and other times, even a sensual loving touch will piss her the hell off. So, read the room! :)

You often wont get an answer from her, or even know what to say while she goes through different waves of intensity, emotion, energy, and fatigue.

Watch her breathing.

Ask her, “What is your body telling you?”.

It is hard work, but stay in the moment! I have seen partners or other members of the birth team completely out of sync from the birthing mama. Gossip between nurses, giggles, or leaving her alone as another surge is coming. (My delivery nurse was really upset about Starbucks being closed.)

3. Holding Space

“Holding Space” can kinda sound woo-woo. Like what does that even mean?

Imagine you are in a challenging situation— a really important pitch, or job interview, a boxing fight, or even a tough workout that you feel like you are about to quit any moment. Imagine any situation where you have felt a little scared, and uncertain about the outcome. … Now imagine standing behind you is a person who doubts you, or a person who is fearful for you. Even if that fear is coming from a place of love.

Now imagine there is a person standing behind you who feels like you fucking got this!!!!! They are calm and happy, their confidence in you is unshakeable.

That is what “holding space” means. Your energy, what you feel in your core, will have an effect on anyone in the room. So do what you have to do, so that you are prepared to be that rock.

4. Prepare

Don’t expect one birth class to be enough (that goes for mama too), and don’t expect the hospital staff to tell you what to do. Here is a quick list of things you should be familiar with, before your lady goes into labor.

• Pros and cons of Cytotec and Pitocin.

• Ways you can help your partner naturally produce Oxytocin. (Nipple stimulation, massage, running a warm bath.) Oxytocin is the key hormone that will cause labor, and keep labor going strong. Pitocin is synthetic oxytocin.

• Breathing techniques.

• Stages of labor, and why she might need space at some points, and full hands on support during others.

• Positions of labor and how you can physically support them and provide counter pressure to ease pain during contractions.

• Delayed cord clamping.

• How your partner feels about epidural, and if they would want you to just listen to them when they ask for it, or if they would like you to encourage them that they can go without it.

• Are there any health concerns that would lead the care provider to feel there this pregnancy is a “high risk”.

• Asses your own comfort level and tolerance for stress, blood, asking questions, or even politely challenging medical professionals (respectfully).

5. Pack Your Own Hospital Bag

(Unless you are having a home birth, and then in that case, just make sure the pantry is stocked with all the goodies.)

Be sure your lady has some healthy snacks for labor, but I am sure she is on top of that. But also make sure you have plenty of snacks for yourself. A bathing suit for yourself if she plans on laboring in the tubs or shower. A cozy hoodie for sleeping in, because hospital blankets are about as warm as a paper napkin… and so on.

What an Honor it is to Have You Here

Historically birth was no place for men, even the father of the child. My guess is you would be kept outside the home, and in charge of fetching more firewood. Birth was women’s work. But relationships and systems have changed, and I think it is beautiful the father is a key part of the experience. To watch your pregnant lover, bring a new life earth-side. To see their first breath, hear their first cry, and whisper a few sweet words into their tiny ears.

Birth is beautiful, so glad to have you here Dada.

---

You might also like “Preparing for Birth”.

RIP Skimpy Little Dress

I am not sure what is more shocking… that I once wore this skimpy little thing in public, OR… that I kept it around in my closet until now. (I am 33, and happily married, with a child.)

I get wanting to be a hot mom. And just because I had a kid, doesn’t mean I have to resort to frumpy mom jeans. But, have you seen this dress? Can you call this a dress? Does my mom know that I had this thing in my suitcase when I went to Vegas?

I held the dress up to show my husband, and I asked, “Should I keep this?”. And without hesitation, he said with certainty, “No!!”. It wasn’t exactly the reaction I had hoped for from my husband, but truly, it has no use taking up space in my closet. (What little space this little bit of fabric can take up.)

And what about my stiletto heels?

The only surviving photo of me in this dress.

As a collage student, I didn’t own a single pair of rain boots or snow/rain friendly footwear. It was 4-5 inch heals all day, every day! (except for summer when I would wear flip flops and the occasional wedge). I could walk in those heals like it was nobody’s business. I never took my shoes off at a dance party, and I still walked faster than most people who were schlepping from class to class in their sneaks or Uggs. What happened to these shoes; those sexy spikes that made my long legs go on for days? They are literally and figuratively collecting dust, at the bottom of my closet!

I have changed.

I have softened. I partially blame my loving husband for making me feel so safe, and bringing my wildness down to earth a little bit. On our wedding day, I didn’t wear heals. I didn’t wear shoes at all. I wanted my bare feet in the grass.

Now I’m more into flowy than tight, and not only do I not wear 5 in heals, I wear mostly zero drop shoes! I am all about that minimal footwear life.

Sometimes I feel so sad about this change. But then when I think what it would be like if I didn’t change… If I was walking around Trader Joe’s, buying apple sauce for my toddler in THIS DRESS! … Yeah, we have to evolve. Not let go of our young spirit, but evolve along with it somehow. That is probably why I held onto that dress for all these years.

Goodbye Little Dress, and Thank You.

So I slipped this little baby on one last time to confirm… YES, my ass cheeks would show if I took more than 2 steps in this thing, and it’s time for it to have a new life, at some new parties, with a new set of legs. Goodbye.

If you want to capture some of your sexy essence, in that skimpy dress, or in the nude, or in an oversized sweater that just makes you feel warm inside… Let me know! Boudoir photography is one of my favorite styles. Let’s capture and celebrate ALL sides of you!

Thanks for reading friends! And if you thought this was fun, you might also like, “Mug Shot”.

Baby Gear to Skip

You might have read my post about my “Minimalist Momma’s Must Haves”! And this is a continuation of what items I would skip, the second go around.

What do babies really need? A place to sleep, some cute clothes, and a few fun toys? Less is always more in my book. But there are some things that I reluctantly agree, came in handy.

Stuff We Wish We Skipped

Receiving Blankets I found these things to be useless. Before I had a baby I didn’t understand what the difference was between a “swaddle” and a “receiving blanket”. Swaddles are stretchy, breathable, and from my experience, a lot larger. A receiving blanket is thicker (warmer) but not stretchy enough to stay on your baby if you wrap them in it. And it’s too small to be a useful blanket.

Baby Swing This is the perfect example of how all babies are just different. For so many moms, this device was a life saver, and maybe the only way they could get their newborn to sleep. But I found it to be useful for such a short amount of time, I would rather just save the money and space. Also, the we had was designed so that the swinging stops after 30 min… and that will wake the baby up!! To turn it back on, you have to turn the knob that makes the LOUDEST clicking sound. WHY would they make it so loud? When they know parents are trying SO hard not to breathe, because it might wake the baby— why? (Perhaps other brands are better.)

Bottle Sterilizer I am sure there are a lot of moms out there, who wouldn’t want to live without a sterilizer. But I personally used mine about three times. I think that with a clean dish sponge, soap, and warm water, things are clean enough. There also have been some studies that show a little dirt can really do the body good, and build up those immune systems. And my pediatrician agrees!

Glad I Didn’t Buy

Burp Cloths I made my own for free! I was tossing out some of my husband’s t-shirts that he didn’t wear anymore and was like, hmmmm. And what do you know, you can cut the t-sirts into burp cloths, they are so soft, pack small, are absorbent, and free! And because of the material, they stay on your shoulder a lot better than other burp cloths.

Milk Warmer Do you know how fast a little bag of frozen breast milk will defrost in warm water? Fast! So if you have a bowl, or a beer glass, and some warm tap water, that is really all you need. Let the bag sit in the water for a few minutes, and you’re done!

Sit Me Up I was able to borrow one, but we hardly used it. I think it is to help your baby sit up before they can sit up on their own? I found that letting Amir sit and play with toys on the carpet gave him the core strength really quickly, he didn’t need to have pillows around him, or use this thing, to help him sit. As I said in my other post, the Bjorn Bouncer will work as far as being a containment device, as it will grow with them.

Less is More

Baby Clothes You will be doing laundry a LOT, so you don’t need to have 10 shirts, 10 pairs of pants, and 10 pajamas. Adults tend to wash cloths at the end of the week. But you will be doing laundry EVERY day. :) I found that if I had 10 onesies, I only used about 4 of my favorite ones, over and over.

Baby Bottles Because Amir primarily nursed, I also realized that I only needed one or two baby bottles… not all six that I thought I might need. If you plan on formula feeding, or will be pumping and bottle feeding, I am sure you would need more than 3.

Baby Shampoo I bought two bottles, and then was gifted another one. Our son is almost a year old and we are not even half way through the first bottle! Babies only need a tiny bit of soap for their baths, and you don’t need to use soap ever day, so a little will last you a long time.

The Reluctant Must Haves

A Chair You might be thinking, “What?”. But I don’t own one chair. I like to get down on the floor and eat, work, relax like a nomad. But, getting up and down off the floor at 3am while holding a newborn at your breast, and your stitches haven’t healed… a chair would come in REALLY handy. Thankfully after a week or so, my sister (also a mama) knew this! So she brought, her crazy floor sitting sister, a folding chair. So I don’t know about those really comfortable rocking chairs, but a chair, any chair… kinda good to have.

Video Monitor We live in an apartment, so it is pretty easy to hear what is going on, no matter what room you are in. I thought, “Ehh, what do we need a monitor for?”. Well, we got a video monitor, and I don’t know what I would do with out it!

Boppy Pillow/Lounger Not the kind that is used for breast feeding, but one that the baby can snuggle in when they are really small and sleeping all day. It also is a great photo prop! I find this thing totally useless after 3 months, but in the beginning we had it on the couch next to us, or on the floor as a cozy place for the baby to relax or nap.

Stroller This isn’t really a “must have”, but we do use it. I MUCH prefer to go the baby carrier rout! When I could bring my son into stores (pre COVID), I found it a million times easier to have him nestled to my body, and he loves it too. But I got a used stroller base that would fit my car seat, for just 20 bucks. And it is nice to have. Now that my son has outgrown his first carseat, we don’t use a stroller and we don’t plan on buying one. (But my mom tells me I am dead wrong! Haha.)

Pack-n-play These things are such an eye sore to me! But, it serves many purposes. It was what we used at night for Amir before we got a crib. You can take it to grandma and grandpa’s for the baby to nap in, and now I use it by the kitchen so I have a safe place for Amir to play while I wash dishes or cook. (We were not even going to get a crib, we were only going to use the pack-n-play as his crib. Because why have two things that serve the same purpose? But a friend had a beautiful crib that he was trying to get rid of, so we jumped at the opportunity.)

NJ Birth Photographer

Is Birth Photography Right for You?

We are used to seeing the pretty pictures of newborn babies. And who doesn’t love that?… But how did that perfect, tiny, sleeping angel get here?

In conversations with Erika after her birth, she told me that when she looks back at the photos she feels so empowered. She also said, that these photos mean more to her than photos of her wedding day!

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

I had the honor of photographing Erika’s second birth. And she was AMAZING! All natural. I was so in awe of her strength. Her husband, normally a guy who loves to crack jokes and be super silly, was calm and present with her. He was attentive to support her in anyway he could, and offered words of encouragement.

I asked Erika some questions to help expecting mamas who might be interested or curious about having me photograph their birth. :)

Why did you want to have a photographer at your birth?

I decided that I wanted to have a birth photographer during my first pregnancy. we had documented so much of our journey as a couple already and I couldn’t imagine leaving this out. I knew that I wouldn’t be alone during my delivery, that medical staff would be present, so the idea of one more person being present didn’t bother me at all. I had seen so many romantic photos of labor and delivery on the others blogs and the power and beauty behind those images was something that stuck with me long after looking at them. The photos made me empowered and excited to give birth, not scared.

Why did you choose Sarah to be your birth photographer?

Sarah came recommended to us as a wedding photographer. I was struggling to find someone with her style. I was looking for someone who could capture candid moments that I might have otherwise missed. It was important that our photographer be someone who could quickly scan the room and see the beauty in the rawness of the moments, without everything being posed. Sarah’s style delivered. So it was an easy decision to have her also capture our birth, as those moments can’t be posed and the images rely on the photographers ability to capture candid moments that depict the emotions in that moment. It was also pretty special to have her be there for another one of the major moments in our family journey, as she’s been there for our engagement, wedding, maternity and family photos.

Would you do anything differently?

Absolutely nothing. It was such an amazing experience!

What was your biggest worry before birth, about having a photographer at your birth?

My biggest worry was having the photographer miss the delivery!

As I rushed into the room at 3:30am or something like that, Erika said “Sarah, Hurry!!!” This baby was coming fast! :) Unlike most events and photoshoots, birth can only be planned so much (basically not at all). Erika’s husband kept in close contact with me, he let me know that they were expected to head to the hospital over night, and so before I went to bed I set out all my clothes and my camera bag. And I kept my phone volume on high. I was so excited it was hard to sleep. And before the sun came up I was driving to the hospital!

Erika had told me that I should get a photographer for my first birth, a year later. And I thought about it! But I didn’t know what to expect, and wasn’t even sure who to ask. But looking back I really wish I took her advice!!! These are the only photos I have of the experience. And let me TELL you, this is NOT the full story, haha!

Let’s Talk!

If you are curious about having a birth photographer, or a photographer take some photos of that magical time following birth, we can discuss everything. No matter what your plan is, hospital or home birth, I would love to be there in that space with you.

I really hope to empower women with my photography, to capture a side of ourselves that we don’t yet know in the same way, as we will when we are giving birth. Birth is magical, wet, messy, natural, …beautiful. It is more real than anything, yet even when we see it with our own eyes or experience it personally, it is so hard to comprehend. There is so much mystery these days around birth, I want to normalize birth, breastfeeding, the body, and the human experience.

xo

Sarah

---

You might also like…

Preparing for Birth

A Poem for My Baby

As we approach my son’s first birthday, I remember the feelings of being literally one living being— physically inseparable. When the line between my body and his body was blurred. And now, as I hold that precious time close to my heart, I embark on celebrating his independence in this world.

Photo by Susan Baker Photography

I Used to be Your Ocean

My heartbeat, used to be your favorite song.

My heartbeat was with you, all night long.

My blood, used to pump through your veins.

My blood pumped inside of your heart,

And my pulse made your heartbeat start.

My inhale gave you oxygen,

And my exhale gave you life.

I was your ocean, I was your air.

The first thing I felt was your wild hair.

I was your ocean where you were free.

But I knew, in order to meet you, 

You would have to leave me.

We walked, we danced, we ate as one.

But you must go... to speak, and dream, and run.

I was your ocean.

Now you are my world.

By Sarah Awad

---

(Above) Photo Credit to Susan Baker Photography

(Above) Photo Credit to Jackie Wolf

In the early weeks, I remember dancing gently in the shower, as I would always do while pregnant, and I realized that he wasn’t in my tummy anymore. My heart dropped, similarly to when you realize you locked your keys in the car, or forgot your phone at home. How could he not be here?

In the womb, it was so easy to keep him perfectly content. A warm place with all the love, safety, and nutrients he could ever need. But apart from me, he could feel cold, tired, hungry, or wonder where I was.

But they figure it out, and they grow, and get strong. And life here on earth is beautiful, so I can’t keep him all to myself.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

You might also like

Please Don’t Grow

Birth Story

It seems strange…

Because, a woman just experienced the most profound, mind bending, body changing, heart opening experience of her life, and people want to know, “How much did the baby weigh?”.

Perhaps it’s too personal? Maybe women don’t want to share their birth experience, so people just don’t ask? Instead, —“Is it a boy or a girl?”. But I think women do want to share. And I think the more that women share, the more they can be empowered by their experience, and the less mystery there will be around birth for first time moms.

Don’t sugar coat it, but…

I think, because so few ask how the mother is doing after birth, the only opportunity women have to share, is when other expecting moms are asking around for advice. And I have found that women just unload! And there are a lot of horror stories. Women should share what they went through, but perhaps blurting out how traumatic it was, or how crazy they would be to not get an epidural, isn’t exactly helpful.

I was so thankful for the few mothers who shared their empowering stories with me, I held onto their words in my head and heart. I hope that my story can paint a picture while also getting women excited about their birth experience!

I am an open book, and this is a happy story!

Fast forward 24 or so hours of labor… My eyes were closed tightly, all I could see was darkness and this white hot circle of pain, deep deep inside my belly. A force stronger than me, pulling me open from the inside, connecting this world with some other dimension. All I could hear was my husband’s voice, “You’re doing it, keep breathing”. He didn’t sound scared. But at this point, I was scared. For hours, contractions came one on top of the other, wave after wave… I was drowning. “Breathe”, he would say. My lungs expanded more deeply than ever in my life, but there was no air. How could I do this for 4 or 8 more hours?

It was a holiday weekend, and a full moon. Labor and Delivery at the hospital was full— every room. And they were short handed. My midwife was busy delivering two other babies, so she popped in when she got a chance. She and the nurse believed I still had a long way to go.

At this stage, I felt like I was loosing control. I just needed a break between contractions, there were supposed to be breaks! I just wanted this to be over, and they offered me an out. I don’t even remember this, but apparently I was pissed at the nurse for mentioning an epidural, and I said no. But, I remember asking myself, “How can I do this for much longer? Let alone hours longer.” … Then my body started to push, the nurse noticed and was worried. She warned me that I couldn’t push yet.

But it WAS time to push. They had to get some other doctor who wasn’t delivering a baby at the moment to come check, and my body knew what to do, I was ready… I didn’t have 4-8 more hours like they were telling me. This was like spotting land in the distance, after being lost at sea. My midwife appeared, and they gave me oxygen.

I pushed! Fearing no pain, feeling unstoppable… I was loud! I knew that people down the hall and in the other rooms could hear me, and I just didn’t care. I felt his head, and I pushed some more. And moments later (I think 13 min?), a life. A wet little body in my arms. 

…

Rewind 28 hours, and I was just a pregnant woman walking around the apartment wondering, WHEN will this baby ever come? And then, my water broke!!!! :)

I was too excited and happy to sleep. Plus, contractions (mild) woke me up ever 20 min to an hour. In the morning I showered, and on the way to the hospital, I made Abe stop at Trader Joe’s because I wanted apple sauce. Walking around the store, no one knew that I was in labor, and it was pretty funny. It was just an ordinary day for everyone else, but we were on a journey that would change our lives forever!

Like I said, Labor and Delivery was packed, and they couldn’t get me into a delivery room for over 2 hours. We were stuck in this tiny triage room with no bathroom… it was not ideal! I was still hardly dilated, so they gave me some medication to help soften my cervix, and whoa, things started to get a lot more intense after that.

Finally in the delivery room, we tried to settle in. The nurse though… It seemed like she came back from retirement because they were short staffed. She didn’t know how to work the computer. She asked me what my pain level was, then argued and put down what she thought I was feeling — alright! I didn’t feel like I could trust her, and she made me nervous.

The waiting game… Meditation, mantras, breathing, bouncing, leaning on the bed, taking a really hot shower in the dark bathroom while dancing to drums. My husband put counter pressure on my hips during contractions, and that was really helpful. You try everything, and just ride the waves.

The waves grew larger and closer together. But my midwife checked my cervix and, she over embellished to make me feel better because, I was still less than 3cm.

Birth will strip away any ego or shame we might usually have guarding us. I never even peed with my husband in the room, but today, I was going number two with my arms wrapped around his waist. We reached a whole new level, haha. (The details of this chapter don’t need to be on the internet…. so, moving on!!!)

And that brings us back to where I started this story. Hours of intensity, with seemingly no end in sight. Holding on with just my breath and the support of my husband. With all the experience the nurses had, my body knew better. And I can only imagine that the second time around, knowing that will be my biggest ally.

Trust your body. We are capable of so much more than we can imagine. Birth is hard, but I can’t think of anything that could be more rewarding. No one can take that away from us.

---

You might also like…

Preparing for Birth

Life is Why

“Wow, that’s a really nice camera you got there!” … Is something photographers hear a lot, often from the person in the room that knows the least about cameras. :)

A friend of mine Francesco (and bad ass photographer) used to say to me, “When people eat great food at a restaurant, do they say, ‘Wow! This food tastes good. The chef must use a really nice oven!’? No.”

The point is, to me, the camera is irrelevant in some ways. If you don’t know how to use it, or if your subject isn’t feelin’ the moment, if the light isn’t giving you that glow or that edge…. the photo will be flat, emotionless, —bad.

At the moment, the only photo I care about, is this one. …

And it was taken with my iPhone… an “old” iPhone as many might say. But this photo is real. This photo captures how I truly feel inside as a mother.

And it is that realness that I am always working to find when I am photographing a couple, family, or individual. What are the gestures, the actions, the expressions we make every day, that tell the story of our real life— the human experience. We don’t smile blankly… we give subtle glances, we laugh, we hug, we snuggle, we take deep breaths.

So people, I am glad you like my camera. Yes it is a tool that helps me do what I love to do. But a camera has absolutely nothing to do with why I am a photographer, or how I want you to feel when you look at my photos.

Life is why.

You might also like to read “Photographer for Life”

and

“If This Bunny Could Talk”.

Minimalist Momma's Must Haves

Anyone who knows me, knows I cannot stand “stuff”! If I can get rid of things, it makes me much happier than it does to get new things. And anyone with children, knows that (no matter how hard you try) “stuff” accumulates over night!

New moms get so much advice on the best “stuff” (often from BuyBuyBaby ads) to have for their baby. Much of it is nonsense if you ask me, but some things I just couldn’t live without!!

The Top 5 Newborn Must Haves

Haakaa For breastfeeding moms, this is a game changer!! Pumping sucks… I needed to shoot a wedding 3 weeks after Amir was born, and I needed to build up a 12 hour supply of breast milk, and fast! Pumping was scary, it hurt, and I wasn’t getting milk (probably because I was so tense and hated it). BUT, with the Haakaa, it’s 100% painless (Also you don’t end up with a million parts to wash). I would wear the Haakaa on one side when nursing the baby on the other, and it would collect an once per day. Some women can get much more than that! It saved my life! I almost NEVER have to use my breast pump. It is also affordable.

Nose Frida Babies have tiny little noses, and they get stuffed up so easily. :( This handy dandy device would allow me to clear his nose. I don’t know what we would do without it! We never left the house with out this thing. Unlike the old fashioned bulb sucker, this allows you to see exactly how much you are getting out, AND best of all, you can take it apart and WASH IT in seconds! :) And it might seem gross, but there is a thick sponge that would stop any boogies from getting sucked up into the straw, so have no fear!

Changing Pad Liners As your little one gets older, these won’t be as dire. BUT, I still use them, and will until he is potty trained. But when you are changing a newborn, the blow out diapers and the peeing all over the place is a regular occurrence. You only really need one changing pad cover, if you have enough of these liners on hand! (I would have about 6 total, you can go through 3 in one night.) They are so quick to swap out for a clean one, rather than changing the whole cover.

Swaddles I loved to swaddle Amir when he was so tiny and small. Once your little one learns to roll over you will likely switch to sleep sacks, but until then these worked much better in my opinion. They are also great as burp cloths, or as something to cover the floor/bed/grass while you lay them down. They make a nice light weight blanket to take along with you incase it gets a little chilly, or if the sun is beaming down on them. And I love the adorable patterns. They are great for covering up while nursing in public, and I plan to use one of them as a scarf!

Bouncer There is a difference between a bouncer, a swing, a sit-me-up, and a jumper (and there are so many styles and brands of each). This is extremely confusing when they seem like the same thing and you don’t know what to put on your registry. The bouncer, (in particular the one we have grows with them), for little baby to apparently a 2 year old. This thing was pricy, way more expensive than other bouncers, but I like its minimal design and fold ability. It is so easy to clean too! My friend takes theirs to the beach all the time.

Toys That Grow With Them

Children learn through play, and as babies develop, they will need different toys…

But this could mean a truck load of toys in your living room, after just a few months. (UGH, kill me now!) I wish that my home still looked like the zen garden that it once was, but we are doing a decent job at keeping the toy accumulation to a minimum. Best way to do this? Find the toys that grow with them!

Musical Instruments We were lucky enough to get a bag full of musical instruments and they were his first toys. Before Amir could even grasp something, or see a drum to hit, he could hear the sounds when we would play them. Once he could hold onto something, the maracas were his favorite. And now at around 10 months old, he loves to bang on the drum, and shake (and bite) all of the other fun noise makers. And who knows, it might open his world to the love of music, and I can see him playing with these toys for years to come. (I have fun playing with them too.)

Activity Mat Laying on their back, with toys above them was about the only thing that a baby can do for the first 2 months that doesn’t involve you having to hold them. Because trust me, sometimes you just NEED to put them down! (Unless you don’t pee, shower, cook, get dressed, eat, or work.) I didn’t realize at first how versatile this mat was. Most toys are only good for a phase… about 2 months or something. But this was a staple for at least 6 months, and we still use the removable little toys that hang from the top. I even put a blanket over the top for a mini fort! There are a million styles of these, so you will be sure to find one to fit your aesthetic.

Books ( << That one is his current favorite.) We have a black and white book that Amir loved even as a two week old. Black and white contrast is one of the only things a newborn can see. It was beautiful to see his eyes widen when something came into his focus for the very first time. He would just look, and I wondered so bad what he might be thinking! Now when we read it to him, he tries to mimic the animal sounds. And obviously books are something that we are never too old to enjoy!

The Surprising Bonus Buys

Derma Frida When you buy one thing, and it serves four purposes, it’s a major win! :) My son had some dry skin on his scalp as a newborn, and this is made to gently exfoliate. It did the job, and you can also use it as a wash cloth. But Amir LOVES to use it as a teether. Out of all the teethers that we got for him, this one is his favorite. The little nub that sicks out as a handle, he puts it in his mouth like a pacifier! Haha. And when my children are grown, I believe this will make an excellent veggie scrubber. :)

Stacking Bowls Instead of buying one of the stacking toys out there, why not get something that is functional too!? I love these, and use them all the time, and it is now his favorite “toy” to play with while we are in the kitchen. And one day I am sure we will use them to bake cookies together too. :)

Other Toys that You Didn’t Know Were Toys: recycling, rolling pin, rubber spatula, plastic hangers, old computer keyboard, yoga matt, laundry, boxes, dad’s ear, and the spot on the floor that won’t come off.

Friendly Tip

Find some mom friends with little cuties that are a little older, and a little younger. Not only will you find friendship and support among woman that will understand, but, I see no better way to find a new home for the “stuff” your baby has out grown. As well as save a lot of money by accepting cute and loved hand me downs!

I hope you found some of these ideas and links helpful! Moms, I would love to hear your must haves down below!!

---

You might also like “Preparing for Birth”, and coming soon… “Baby Gear to Skip!”

A Walk in the Rain

If you have ever gotten stuck in the rain, you remember it!

The best part about getting stuck in the rain, is there is nothing you can do to stop it. You’e gonna get wet! And your brain is like, “Oh no! I’m getting wet!... And my CLOTHES are gonna get wet!”. And the other part of your brain is like, “You get wet in the shower, and your clothes get wet every time you wash them… so what’s the problem here?”. This is also true… but why does it still feel so weird/wrong?

But, once you accept that your hair, your face, your clothes, your shoes— are all going to get wet, you are FREE! And it can be blissful! :) … I suppose if you are on your way to work, no one wants to sit in cold wet cloths all day. But if you’re not going to be stuck somewhere, I recommend, the next time it rains… go for a walk. :)

---

I have SO many endearing thoughts about the rain! Yesterday I took my baby boy for a swim in the pool and it started to rain. And still I thought, “Oh no, we will get wet!”… (What is wrong with me? Haha). And on the drive home, I saw a huge rainbow, and New York City sparkled like the buildings were carved from opal.

Kids should play in the rain…

When it rains, I am sure to take my 10 month old out on our fire escape to feel the droplets, and listen to the sounds. One of my fondest childhood memories is when my parents let us play in the rain! It rained so hard that our driveway flooded a bit. It was such a hot summer day I can still remember how warm the water felt as we splashed around barefoot, in the ankle deep puddle.

My family will never forget…

I am sure every family has those famous stories that are told over, and OVER. Our family’s story took place on vacation, and when we were “a mile” (or something) away from the car, the sky opened up and started to pour BUCKETS!! I was young, I am guessing 5 or something? (I’ll have to have my mom fact check this story.) I remember sitting in the back of my dad’s huge pickup truck, as he stood outside wringing his shoes out, and my mom was in the passenger seat CRACKING UP! … Getting wet in the rain will set you free! :)

(My mom said she thinks I was probably more like 3 years old. So who’s to know how much of this memory is mine, or just implanted from hearing the story so many times.)

Just a few years ago…

My husband and I took a trip to Montreal with our friends Rosa and Miguel. We walked up to the top of Mount Royal on a beautiful (and sunny) day. And then, the sky got dark. We figured we would head back before it started raining too hard. And it just started to rain harder and HARDER! It was like going for a 45 minute walk, directly under a shower head. We couldn’t even wipe the water from our eyes because our hands were dripping wet. We were all totally soaked to our underwear! Once we accepted it, the walk in the rain was AMAZING, and now one of my fondest memories as well. :) Had the sun been shining, I doubt I would be talking about it now. (And thankfully all of our phones survived!)

The song I can’t get out of my head…

“I’ll never stop the rain, by complaining. Because I’m free. Nothin’s worrying me.” - B.J. Thomas.

I have carefully curated a playlist to sing to my little one. (More on that in a future post!) And this song, “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head” is now one of my favorites!! I encourage you to go take a listen. Who knew that this adorable old song had lyrics to live by!

---

If you are interested in having a photoshoot in the rain, please message me!!!

Father's First Look

One of my favorite moments in a wedding is when the bride and groom see each other for the first time, it is probably the most sought after photos by most couples, as well. But the lesser talked about First Look between a bride and her father is always sweet and emotional!

They all don’t go down the exact same way. Some fathers are dressed with cuff links and all at 8am, pacing around the house, and the girls yell, “No you can’t go in that room, her dress is hanging up.”, And they are in tears long before they even turn around to see her. Other dad’s are chillin! Just enjoying a beer, sitting outside reading the paper, or down in the hotel lobby talking with friends from out of state. And the girls are yelling once again, but this time it’s, “Dad, go shower!!”, and “Are you ready yet? We need to go!” But it is just their way of coping, emotions are high, and even the toughest of tough guys, often melt in this special father daughter moment.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

---

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

And if you zoom out, and you picture that same father, much younger, with tears in his eyes as he hold his little baby girl for the first time… not knowing how he will do it. Wondering what it will be like to be a father, how to teach her that she is strong and beautiful and loved…. Suddenly you can’t hold back tears yourself, as you see a father in awe of the woman his little baby has grown up to be. How can he let her go? I am sure there is always a part of them that wishes they could just play in the yard together one more time, and kiss her tiny head.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

---

And this wouldn’t feel complete without a shout out to my own dad! :) I am one of three girls, and he has helped shape each one of us in so many ways. I wouldn’t be where I am today, and I wouldn’t have my work ethic, if it were not from my dad’s example. He pushed us because he believed in us!

We all have so many fond memories with our dad: playing baseball (even though we were probably all terrible), building snow tubing ramps in our back yard, jumping waves in the ocean, helping him with his many projects in the garage, (Oh….And a few terrifying memories of doing math homework with Dad!! Hehe). He sat through many dance recitals, and when I finally realized that I liked martial arts, he would come with my mom to watch and support.

Here is a little peak at our first look on my wedding day!

I love you Dad!

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

(Photography by Susan Baker Photography)

Photographer For Life

The only compliment better than being recommended to friends and family, is to be called back to photograph another chapter of a couple’s love story.

When I photographed this family last weekend, I remember the look in their eyes, when they looked at each other on their engagement shoot, back in 2012. Their minds filled with the possibilities, of “imagine when…” and “what if we…”. And BOOM, the dream is reality..

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

Love, commitment, growth, then family…

And when these little ones arrive, love takes on a whole new meaning. And that person who makes you laugh, isn’t just there for the fun times. Now you have history together. Hard times, busy schedules, and routine changes us, but it all comes back to this… Two people dreaming of how wonderful life could be, when spending it together.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

Change doesn't happen over night, but sometimes it feels like it does. Meeting my husband feels like a life time ago, but still vivid enough to feel like it was only yesterday. I was so naive to the fact that my whole life just changed in that instant. And here we are, almost four years married, and our son in my arms. The cycle of life is profound, I am so thankful that I get to capture it.

5 Things Brides Say Was a Waste of Money

I remember when I was a bride, just how many companies tried to up-sell me on things, and tug at my heart strings, not knowing I was in the industry… Not cool.

So what can you cut out of the long list of things you need to pay for on your wedding day? I asked some of my amazing brides that had unique, personal, and memorable weddings, to see what they said.

So the good news is…

More and more brides and grooms are saying “no thanks” to old and costly traditions, and taking their wedding plans into their own hands! And because of this, the overwhelming majority of brides I talked to, say that there WASN’T a whole lot that they felt was a waste of money. And, if they were to go back and do it all again, they really wouldn’t change things! This makes me SO happy! :) … I guess I have some pretty budget savvy couples!

But, do you know what really shocked me…

Most of the bride’s I spoke to said they wouldn’t have spent less on something, but wish they spent MORE on a videographer or DJ. And I fall in that exact same boat as well. I wish that I had spent more on a different DJ. He was a great guy, and the price was unbeatable, but he had promised some things, like a specific type of dance floor lighting (I’m a photographer, I know what I wanted!) and he did not deliver. A few bride’s mentioned that they went with a cheaper videographer, and the end product wasn’t what they had hoped for.

However, a few things came up, over and over, that brides and grooms felt was not impactful to the day, and they could have done without.

The 5 Things Brides Say They Could Have Lived Without

1. Party Favors

   Yup, like a little bag of candy to eat on the ride home? As if the mountains of food served for the past 5 hours would leave guests starving… One bride said it best. “Your guests love you, but they could probably do without your wedding monogrammed koozie.” haha! Plus, as a wedding photographer, I often see favors sitting on the tables at the end of the night, untouched. And that means the extra four bucks times however many guests, is going down the drain. So, if you cut it out all together, I don’t think many would notice or mind. But if you do want to do something, but don’t want to buy 150 bottle openers… It has become more popular to make a donation to a cause that is meaningful to the couple.

2. Wedding Party Gifts

   Some of my lovely brides went a little overboard, and showered their bridal party with gifts. One bride realized that if she were to get her bridesmaids something, it would only be something that they could REALLY use after the wedding was over. So things like a robe that says “Bridesmaid”, seemed kinda like a waste in the end. And after all, they are there because they love you, not because they want a free necklace, or a wine glass that says “Maid of Honor”.

3. Flowers

   Now, we are not hating on flowers, or the gorgeous work that so many talented florists do for weddings. But the fact is, it’s temporary, and guests might notice, but it isn’t going to be the thing they go home talking about. If you choose a venue that is your style anyway, chances are it doesn’t need a whole lot of added decoration.

4. Extra Food/Desert at the End of the Night

   I think the best way to describe this is “extra”. Milk and cookies anytime, anywhere, is NOT a bad thing! However, it isn’t needed… and if you want to find a way to save, couples recommend you don’t splurge on this one.

5. Formal Invitations

   Who’s idea was it to ship a package filled with so many envelopes, cards, and stamps? And does anyone use the directions card, on how to drive to your venue if they are coming from Rt.80 West vs. the Parkway North? Umm, someone just call Grandma an Uber. … All joking aside, there is something beautiful and regal about a well made, formal wedding invitation. However, if something needs to get cut, so that you can afford the wedding dress of your dreams, or a photographer who will help you remember the whole day (wink wink), don't sweat the gold embossing.

All in all, trust your gut!

Couples that sit down together, and figure out what means the most to them, were all very happy with their decisions in the end. If flowers are super important to you, don’t hold back baby! If you really like a veil, but feel it is unfairly priced and you care more about dancing with your friends, chances are you are not going to miss that expensive piece of tulle.

A lot goes into creating your dream wedding, and unfortunately no matter how you slice it, a good amount of money too. But hopefully this will give you a little extra confidence to cut out the small things that you and your love won’t miss anyway. :)

Awad of Clay

One of the MANY perks of being married to the love of my life, was getting his last name! And therefore being able to call my sculpture business “Awad of Clay”! :)

I really miss photographing families and weddings right now!! But, an upside to this social distancing lifestyle, is that I have had some time to get back in my art studio, and sculpt.

Awad of Clay is all about bringing a little bit of happiness to others. And I mean a “little” bit. Because I love to sculpt tiny little things! :) Why is it that the smaller the thing, the happier it makes me?

These little sculptures all started with my tribe of clay elephants. Each one hand carved, hand painted, and no two the same. In college I sculpted over 100 of them. Many of them I fell so in love with, that they became a part of my private collection. Others I would personally select and give as gifts to the very special people in my life. These elephants are a symbol of happiness, pure intentions, and good energy. I have some elephants from college for sale, and am always happy to create new custom elephants.

My most popular creations, are my clay animals that hold your metal tea ball to the side of your cup. The fox, bunny, and turtle “Tea Ball Friends” seem to be the crowd favorites. However once customers realized that I could make custom animals and pets, that became my best seller. Who wouldn’t want a tiny replica of their dog to sip some tea with?

The most recent addition to my clay shop are my mini kettle bell necklaces. I do make plain kettle bells, but of course I can’t stop there!. Inspired by Onnit’s Primal Kettle Bells, I sculpt samurai, octopus, bee, moon, and feather kettle bells.

The only time I forget about food, is when I am sculpting! In college I majored in Fine Art with concentrations in Ceramics, Dance, and Photography. Photography is the focus of my artistic career, however sculpting is my happy place! … Speaking of happy place, I always dreamed of living in a tree house, and have sculpted many little villages and treehouses.

You can find me on Instagram, @AwadofClay

To Look, or Not to Look

One of the big decisions a wedding couple gets to make, is whether or not to do a “First Look”.

What is a “first look” you ask? It is simply when a couple sees each other for the first time on their wedding day, but before they walk down the aisle.

I would say there are three choices when it comes to seeing each other for the first time on your wedding day. And each has different pros and cons. So hopefully this will help you two hash things out! :)

Option One: No First Look!

If your ceremony is at a different location then your reception venue, there really isn’t a need for a first look. You can just build in some time between your ceremony and cocktail hour, so that you can have plenty of time for photos, and you won’t have to miss the tasty hors d’oeuvres. :)

Many have dreamed about the moment they walk down the aisle to see the look on their partner’s face, and seeing each other before the ceremony is just not an option.

The Pros: You can keep things traditional, and everyone can witness that moment along with you. Also, you can avoid some questions from conservative parents and grandparents.

The Cons: If your ceremony and reception are at the same place, this means the only window you will have to take photos, is during your cocktail hour. And this can make your day feel a little rushed. Not only will you be missing the food, drink, and conversation, many of your family and wedding party will have to miss part of it too.

Tip: If you or your partner are shy, or getting married in a more conservative setting, you might not be able to be yourselves when you see each other for the first time, so make sure your photographers are ready outside those church doors, when you two can really let loose, and bond with each other.

Option Two: Yes First Look!

Maybe you didn’t picture your wedding day this way, because likely your parents didn’t do a first look, and you don’t see it much in the movies either. But, you don’t want to miss mingling with your guests at cocktail hour. And maybe your venue has so many places you would like to take pictures, that you couldn’t possibly fit it in after your ceremony.

The Pros: Who wouldn’t want to make the best day of their lives as long as possible? Adding a first look, can give you as much time as you would like, and you get to spend that time together! A private first look can also allow you to feel more like yourselves, you can talk, kiss, and catch up on all the things that went on that morning. And after the ceremony, it is party time! And you two can relax and enjoy your night.

The Cons: Walking down the aisle can still be special, but it won’t be the first time you see each other that day.

Tip: Seeing each other before the ceremony can take a lot of pressure off. Any stress you felt leading up, will melt away when you are in the arms of your love one.

Option Three- Why First Look?

This option is for all of you super chill couples that say, “Um I saw you yesterday, what is the big deal?”. And that means no first look… You just get ready, and casually meet up like you would any other day. And you can still have fun, take your pictures, and then go get married together!

Pros: You don’t have to miss your cocktail hour, you don’t have to feel awkward seeing each other in a formal way on camera, AND you still have as much time as you would like to take pictures and hang out before your ceremony.

Cons: Not sure I see any cons if this is your vibe, and you don’t tend to make a big deal of things. :)

Tip: Your photographers will likely have their cameras ready, and snap a few candid shots as you greet each other.

---

On my wedding day.

I never pictured doing a first look, but I knew from experience, I didn’t want to make my wedding day go by any faster than it would already, or feel rushed at all. And cocktail hour is my favorite part! So I definitely didn’t want to miss that! To my surprise, our first look didn’t make walking down the aisle any less special. When we did our first look I cried, it was so crazy exciting, and I could tell Abraham was so happy. We talked and hugged and kissed, and then took photos together in the gardens, before meeting up with family for portraits.

But when my dad walked me down the aisle, I still cried, AND Abe got a little emotional too. Because this time we were GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!! I would have bet good money that my husband would not cry on our wedding day. I have never seen a tear drop from this man. But seeing each other earlier that day and taking photos, didn’t take away from our wedding ceremony at all. If anything it just helped us feel relaxed and like ourselves, and we were able to really be in the moment at our ceremony.

Of course all couples are different, and you two will know what is best for you!

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

Who photographed my wedding?

Susan Baker! My close friend and photography idol! I will definitely be writing a blog post about working with her, both professionally and personally. Check out her website!