One of the big decisions a wedding couple gets to make, is whether or not to do a “First Look”.
What is a “first look” you ask? It is simply when a couple sees each other for the first time on their wedding day, but before they walk down the aisle.
I would say there are three choices when it comes to seeing each other for the first time on your wedding day. And each has different pros and cons. So hopefully this will help you two hash things out! :)
Option One: No First Look!
If your ceremony is at a different location then your reception venue, there really isn’t a need for a first look. You can just build in some time between your ceremony and cocktail hour, so that you can have plenty of time for photos, and you won’t have to miss the tasty hors d’oeuvres. :)
Many have dreamed about the moment they walk down the aisle to see the look on their partner’s face, and seeing each other before the ceremony is just not an option.
The Pros: You can keep things traditional, and everyone can witness that moment along with you. Also, you can avoid some questions from conservative parents and grandparents.
The Cons: If your ceremony and reception are at the same place, this means the only window you will have to take photos, is during your cocktail hour. And this can make your day feel a little rushed. Not only will you be missing the food, drink, and conversation, many of your family and wedding party will have to miss part of it too.
Tip: If you or your partner are shy, or getting married in a more conservative setting, you might not be able to be yourselves when you see each other for the first time, so make sure your photographers are ready outside those church doors, when you two can really let loose, and bond with each other.
Option Two: Yes First Look!
Maybe you didn’t picture your wedding day this way, because likely your parents didn’t do a first look, and you don’t see it much in the movies either. But, you don’t want to miss mingling with your guests at cocktail hour. And maybe your venue has so many places you would like to take pictures, that you couldn’t possibly fit it in after your ceremony.
The Pros: Who wouldn’t want to make the best day of their lives as long as possible? Adding a first look, can give you as much time as you would like, and you get to spend that time together! A private first look can also allow you to feel more like yourselves, you can talk, kiss, and catch up on all the things that went on that morning. And after the ceremony, it is party time! And you two can relax and enjoy your night.
The Cons: Walking down the aisle can still be special, but it won’t be the first time you see each other that day.
Tip: Seeing each other before the ceremony can take a lot of pressure off. Any stress you felt leading up, will melt away when you are in the arms of your love one.
Option Three- Why First Look?
This option is for all of you super chill couples that say, “Um I saw you yesterday, what is the big deal?”. And that means no first look… You just get ready, and casually meet up like you would any other day. And you can still have fun, take your pictures, and then go get married together!
Pros: You don’t have to miss your cocktail hour, you don’t have to feel awkward seeing each other in a formal way on camera, AND you still have as much time as you would like to take pictures and hang out before your ceremony.
Cons: Not sure I see any cons if this is your vibe, and you don’t tend to make a big deal of things. :)
Tip: Your photographers will likely have their cameras ready, and snap a few candid shots as you greet each other.
On my wedding day.
I never pictured doing a first look, but I knew from experience, I didn’t want to make my wedding day go by any faster than it would already, or feel rushed at all. And cocktail hour is my favorite part! So I definitely didn’t want to miss that! To my surprise, our first look didn’t make walking down the aisle any less special. When we did our first look I cried, it was so crazy exciting, and I could tell Abraham was so happy. We talked and hugged and kissed, and then took photos together in the gardens, before meeting up with family for portraits.
But when my dad walked me down the aisle, I still cried, AND Abe got a little emotional too. Because this time we were GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!! I would have bet good money that my husband would not cry on our wedding day. I have never seen a tear drop from this man. But seeing each other earlier that day and taking photos, didn’t take away from our wedding ceremony at all. If anything it just helped us feel relaxed and like ourselves, and we were able to really be in the moment at our ceremony.
Of course all couples are different, and you two will know what is best for you!
Who photographed my wedding?
Susan Baker! My close friend and photography idol! I will definitely be writing a blog post about working with her, both professionally and personally. Check out her website!